Communicating with our children can sometimes be a difficult task. We have the feeling that they don’t listen to us; They feel like we’re not listening to them. Good listening and communication skills are essential for successful parenting. It pays to listen to your child’s feelings, views and opinions, and you need to make sure you take the time to sit down and listen openly and talk about them honestly.
There seems to be a natural tendency to react rather than respond. We judge based on our feelings and experiences. However, being empathic means being open to our child’s feelings and emotions and allowing them to express themselves openly and honestly without fear of repercussions on our part. By reacting, we send the message to our child that his feelings and opinions are invalid. But by answering the questions and asking why the child feels this way, you open a dialogue that allows him to talk more about his feelings and allows you to better understand where they are coming from. The reaction also gives you the opportunity to work out a solution or action plan with your child that you may not have thought of on your own. Your baby will also appreciate that he may understand how you feel.
In these situations it is essential to pay close attention to your child. Put the newspaper down, stop washing the dishes, or turn off the television so you can hear the whole situation and make eye contact with your child. Keep calm, be curious, and then offer possible solutions to the problem.
Don’t discourage your child so that he doesn’t feel upset, angry or frustrated. Our initial instinct may be to say or do something to push our child away, but this can be a harmful tactic. Listen to your child again, ask questions to find out why he or she feels that way, and then offer possible solutions to alleviate the bad feeling.
Just like us, our children have feelings and difficult situations. By actively listening and engaging your child as he talks about it, you show them that we care, that we want to help, and that we ourselves have had similar experiences that they can draw on. Remember, answer, don’t react.